Expectation * Our hazy, little world

After a drink in the bar of the hotel, my Owner and i walked back to our room. There i had to undress myself again. Kneeling in front of the bed, You push my head downwards. I thought i was clear that evening, but as i think back to it, i notice that i don't know the right rank of what happened. Pink clouds in my head obstructing clear thinking. I was further in space then i thought i was. I don't remember if You used the belt again on me. Or if You immediately groped and pinched me.

Two fingers deep in me, three, four...... You ask me why i didn't stretch myself at home. 'Cause You notice it goes tiring. Meanwhile You push four fingers inside me, back and forth. Continuously faster. Hard. I don't remember if You pushed Your whole hand inside of me. But i know i was very aroused and came spurting. You continue and i hear the lewdness in Your voice as You snap one humiliation after another at me. I slip away in my hazy little world. Where we are alone. You and i. Where i loose myself in Your spirit. My face in the blankets, i hear Your voice stirring us up. Feeling Your hand deep inside of me, while Your other hand is pushing my head down. Suddenly You penetrate me deep, fucking me with a pent-up rage i've never experienced before. Harsh. Heated. I hear Your humiliating words, but it's only sound. The meaning doesn't get through. Hazy and warm. I feel while Your grip in my hair strenghten. Pulling my head backwards. Then i feel the first slap in my face. Not only my cheek is glowing. More slaps follow. Hazy and warm. i feel as the last slap overwhelms me. For a moment darkness in my head and astonishment. Stars. I see stars as You help me to stand up. Taking me by the hand and lead me to the shower. And i know what comes next.

I'm sitting on the cool tiles. Bent head. The hazyness in my head is gone and a cool intelligibility calms my heated thoughts. Notices how small the shower is. How this space is filled with great expectations. How my stomach contracts because of the nervously fluttering butterflies. I look up and see Your concentrated face above me. I smile. You too find it difficult to piss under pressure. The pressure of expectations this time. I open my mouth, but close it nervously as i feel how the first drops spatter on my face. It's a little stream so i carefully open my mouth again to receive some of Your piss. I feel emotional as i taste You. As i swallow You. Your salty taste linger against my palate. I was afraid that i had to throw up, but i didn't. I get all warm inside. The little stream stops. I giggle.

'That's a stream of nothing.' i hear You mumble. Your face even more concentrated. I take You in my mouth and taste. Time seems to stand still. In the silence of this cool, white space, where a second seems to be an eternity, i wait patiently while i take in Your face. As i open my mouth again, and my tongue hesitating sticks out, i suddenly see a great relief on Your face that uncovers a big smile. A salty, warm beam touches my face, tongue and heart while i swallow, taste, swallow and notice how Your warm fluid clear a way through my body. Grateful i am that this first time the stream wasn't that plentifull. You put on the warm shower as i hide in Your arms. After which You tenderly wash Your dirty girl. I show You my gratitude by many, many little-girl-kisses.

Images that make my head spin

Because of the minimal contact between T. and myself i was weary and calm. But after a number of delicious text messages from my Owner the submissive in me started to sparkle again. I woke up in a very sunny mood and thoughts about my Owner excited me. I sended a morning greeting and the question if i was allowed to come.

I give you an orgasm-command; you're allowed to come on the toilet the way I've teached you. Like a dirty girl, the horny obliging piss-slut of your Owner.

This answer makes me feel small. Those words; dirty, horny, obliging piss-slut are affecting me somehow. They feel humiliating and degrading. But my body-reactions make very clear that those affecting words arouses me very much.
I am wondering if i had to pee in my pantyhose or if i have to pee over my hand and then taste it. Given that i have to do it on the toilet i choose for the last option. To finger myself on the toilet does a lot to me. It feels disparaging and very, very slutty. To do this on the wc is dirty, to me that is. Probably acquired behavior from my childhood; the toilet is a dirty place. So dirty piss-slut is a correct definition. * blush * Nevertheless without any shame i sit down astride. As i start to pee i hold my hand in the warm spurt of piss and don't hesitate a bit. It almost feels trusted already. It arouses me ever more. Because T. wants me to do this. Because He's thinking of me at that very moment, knowing what i'm doing. As the piss runs down my hand, suddenly i smell it much stronger and very aware, i almost come. Because i'm thinking of my Owner, imagining how He would piss over me. His smell in my hair, His taste in my mouth. How would that be? I never could presume that i'm craving for it right now. These thoughts that make me come without using my fingers. But i can hold my orgasm. I wanna enjoy this intense excitement a little bit longer. Conscious tasting and smelling my pee. Because as i stop pissing, i place my fingers in my mouth and taste myself. I feel light-headed. T. buzzes in my thoughts. Carefully i lick my fingers. Feeling embarrassed but oh so horny. So terribly aroused. Thoughts on my Owner are connecting us, as if He's standing next to me.

i can feel His firm grip in my hair, pulling my head backwards.
"Open your mouth!"
i see His penetrating glance before He pisses in my mouth and i don't let it run but i swallow and swallow and heave and swallow and taste. Him. i don't wanna spill a drop. And my Owner burns in my stomach. He glows on my cheeks after the slap in the face.

Deep i push my fingers inside of me and roughly moving them in and out. Rough and hard, so that i dispel my intense craving to my Owner. In between i hit my cunt and then again..... rough and hard. Even harder because this craving hurts. As an orgasm arises i push my fingers deeper and start to pee again. The orgasm overflows me and gets on for a long time. While images of my Owners eyes observing me, his hands torturing me and His warm piss that runs over me are making my head spin.

'Lift me up, lift me up ooooooh lala lala.'

A strange place for coming home

But in past time You thought such a cabine is revolting? i look at Him in an i-can't-believe-it way.
"This time it will be different mo, trust Me."

The naughty little girl feeling is still there as we enter the videotheque. Fortunately there are no other customers. The decent man behind the desk behaving in a impartial way. When T.'s deliberating with the man, i so called interested go through the DVD's. We have to choose one. Ofcourse i'm looking at the SM movies. The one more ridiculous than the other considering the covers. T. grabs one, takes my hand and we're walking to the back.

It's a little room. With a not real leather sofa, a low table with a large televison. It doesn't smell and actually it's clean. i imprint myself that the sofa gets desinfected every time. No, i don't have fear of stains. ;-) Such a strange situation. Here i am, with a Man i'm acquainted with for not so long, who i call recently my Owner, in a cabine of a sexvideotheque. A so called 'jerk off room'. And i'm feeling at ease, curious to what will happen next. T. places the DVD at the player. i start to laugh 'cause the Dominant and his victim in the movie are speaking a kind of Russian. But ofcourse, that's not the point in a room like this. A good story.
T. blindfolds me and commands me to undress. Clumsy, 'cause i can't see anything, i remove my clothes. i don't feel any embarrassment or insecurity. Naked, into the light, i'm standing in front of Him, knowing He's looking at me. i feel small, but full of trust. He turns me around, pushing me face forward, my hands on top of the television. Of which i can hear in this strange language the woman counting in the blows she's audibly clear receiving. Then i receive the first blow from T. This moves me very much, emotionally. This is the exact beginning of our D/s relationship. A warm feeling of love. i get another blow and more. The sounds of the DVD are forced back to the background. The hands of T. making my behind glow. Enlighted i push my buttocks in the direction of His hands, wanting more. And i get more, much more.

"How many blows did you receive mo?"

i don't have the answer, because i didn't count. Meaning my Owner starts again from the beginning. Aloud i count in. The astonishment i feel because of my serenity and dedication. In the past it often happened that i, first time playing, being blindfolded, in a strange place, fellt nauseous. Not now with T. Peace of mind, trust and excitement was what i fellt. So i surrender myself to Him completely.

On my hands and knees on the uncomfortable floor. The cane hitting my behind and i start to float. T.'s joy because of my deepred coloured buttocks. My knees are hurting, i wanna relief them from the pain so i crawl to the sofa to hang over it. More blows from the cane. From then i don't know exactly how or when.
F l o a t i n g..........
T. is sitting upon me, so i feel His weight on me. i suppose because He can hit me better and He has a good look on the colouring progress of my behind. T. loves to observe. His weight takes away my breath a bit but i love it to feel Him this way. The feeling to be nothing more than a fun toy that He wants to examine thoroughly. His weight on me is giving me a safe, protected feeling. Then He turns me around. He unbuckles His trousers. The sound of the belt He's tearing loose giving me shivers of desire.

"This is what you're craving for, isn't it slut of Mine? Feeling my belt on your soft skin?"

An approving sigh full of longing escapes my lips. Then i feel the slap of His belt on my already glowing skin. But what a joy! Silently i hope my "ouch! ouch!" cries are not holding Him back. It didn't. This dull aching gets through deeply. This delicious deep pain shuddered for days. Like some strange muscular pain. In fact i still feel it, but no longer that intense.

He's standing in front of me, i'm sitting on the sofa looking up. Though blindfolded i can feel His intense, observing glance on me. Making me modest and that feels so good. He's slapping His hard cock in my face, changing it at times by filling my hungry mouth. Deep in my throat. He pushes me back on the sofa. Therefore laying backwards, not worrying about my body anylonger ;-), my legs widely spread, i lay there totally opened for Him. Clamps on my nipples and on my cunt. Because of the clamps on my cunt my clit is pushed upwards. Softly T. is blowing over my clit and takes me in His mouth. An intense orgasm follows. Then i amaze myself even more. i've never done this before, couldn't say or ask it, but this time it happened. i'm begging T. to give me some more pain. He hits my breasts and my cunt hard. At some point i'm offering my cunt for more blows of His hand and the cane. Other (or more?) clamps on my labia. On it attached a chain and some weights. Weights i already saw on a photo; looking like beautiful little towers. Rather heavy. My Owner pulls on the chain, making the weights move. i can't remember it, but then i cried stop! T. removes the clamps. Again He fills my mouth with His masculinity. i tease Him a bit with my tongue. At last He pushes himself deep in my mouth, His hands in a firm grip grabbing my hair, still deeper in my throat, i suppress the urge to heave. Humiliating words at my direction, telling me what else He has in mind tormenting me, making me very, very aroused. i feel how He's holding my head vigorous as He growly ejaculates.