Trust

Photograph; Little pet by HOTgraFX

Trust is one of the posts in a relationship. Since the very beginning i feel familiar with T. And when we met RL that tuesday and saw each other for the first time that familiar feeling was still there, the trust. After this meeting, as you could read, i felt jumpy, yearning and dreamy. The promiss T. made to see each other again made me happy. And that's an understatement.

The friday after i received a mail from Him that made me more restless. He wrote He was travelling North, passing my hometown.

Do you travel a bit along with Me?

i send Him a mail back in which i describe a sexy story about what will happen when i get in the train. i had a busy weekend so fortunately not much time for craving but ofcourse sometimes my thoughts were wandering. At monday i send Him a sms;

and....did You see me waving at You?

That monday i was busy working. Tuesday goes by. Since friday there was this loud silence. i began to worry. i mail Him that it was a week ago that we met, so nearby, but it also seems so far away. That everything is softly glowing inside of me.

Wednesday...... silence. i try to banish my growing agitation; i do know T. is a busy man, travelling a lot because of His work. He made me this promiss to be clear, that He won't drop me. Because of the betrayed trust in former relationships i didn't manage to suppress my insecurity. i feel embarrassed about this. In the evening i feel so much stress that i mail Him about my restless, insecure feelings. Fortunately at thursdays it's also very busy at work, but when i finally arrive home, i immediately open my mailbox. There it is; His name glistens towards me. i wait for awhile, dare not open it. Reading the first phrase takes away all turmoil. Radiant i continue reading.

Hi, sweet tumbling and restless subbie of Mine.

Again i read this phrase. Of Mine. These words make me glow. This is how i feel it, how i wanna feel. As a submissive i am His. His mail contains some virtual punishment.

Shame on you mo! Three times shame on you! Because you doubted me.

i dó feel ashamed, but i feel ashamed laughing 'cause i feel so happy right now! Indeed T. was travelling because of His work. He promisses me that from now on He'll not keep me ignorant when He's away. Because of this grace i need to fulfil a command. i'll do it with heartiness. More about that in a next blog.

Glowing i will enjoy my weekend. i feel good and renowned. From now on i will not feel insecure unrest. His words touching me deep inside, giving me peace and trust. More than.......